Why is it taking so long to get rid of the little fat deposits around my waist area? You damn well know I run like a maniac and do weights.
Is it because I love fried food?
If it is because of food, well, I'm not ready to give that up again.
Love,
You Know Who
Sunday, September 23, 2012
Dear Universe, Re: Abduction
Can you please keep preventing me from being abducted while I am doing my long run on Sundays?
There were two times when it was so obvious that the driver was stalking me. Once three weeks ago - couple of dudes in a black Nissan Altima with tinted windows (I think they live down the block), the other time was today when a guy in a white Chevy Blazer u-turned and started heading my way, slowly, very obviously.
Good thing I'm a trained ninja so I'm aware of my surroundings. I sprinted on the other side of the median where the Chevy Blazer dude couldn't get to me because it was a very very public place. I was totally annoyed because I was really enjoying running while listening to 80s Love Songs.
Unless you are giving me a sign to bring my mace with me during my runs? I'm gonna have to consider, I guess. I don't run with security detail during weekends when the fucking sun is up.
Please universe, I don't want to end up like this, okay? I think some people may miss me. Peppy too.
Love,
You Know Who
There were two times when it was so obvious that the driver was stalking me. Once three weeks ago - couple of dudes in a black Nissan Altima with tinted windows (I think they live down the block), the other time was today when a guy in a white Chevy Blazer u-turned and started heading my way, slowly, very obviously.
Good thing I'm a trained ninja so I'm aware of my surroundings. I sprinted on the other side of the median where the Chevy Blazer dude couldn't get to me because it was a very very public place. I was totally annoyed because I was really enjoying running while listening to 80s Love Songs.
Unless you are giving me a sign to bring my mace with me during my runs? I'm gonna have to consider, I guess. I don't run with security detail during weekends when the fucking sun is up.
Please universe, I don't want to end up like this, okay? I think some people may miss me. Peppy too.
Love,
You Know Who
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